Thursday, June 10, 2010

Me: Come Here So I Can

wipe the ketchup off your face.

Him: Why?

Me: I’m not going to let you guys get on the plain looking like trailer trash.

Him: You did last time.

Okay. Maybe I did. I can be guilty of not carrying something around to wipe my kids’ faces off after they smear about 3/10’s of their meal all over their face.

I HATE to carry a purse. I really, really fucking hate to carry a purse.

Why?

Because I am one of the most absent minded people you will ever meet. I lose shit all the time. I forget I have things.

I will set that shit down and forget I ever had it.

One year I bought a jacket. It was a nice jacket too. I wore it to school one blustery winter day. I hung it on the back of my chair during class.

A few days later I was looking for the jacket because it was snowing or some shit.

I could NOT find that jacket anywhere.

Yep. I left that fucker on the back of my chair and didn’t notice for days that it was gone.

What does this have to do with messy faces and my kids looking like trailer trash?

I have no fucking clue.

I didn’t sleep last night and I haven’t pooped in over 2 days.

4 comments:

Ally said...

i hate carrying a purse too but then i think about poor moms who have baby bags!

Ann said...

sorry but I just gotta laugh :)

California Keys said...

Do you ever lose your sunglasses on top of your head?

Anonymous said...

Dude I have my pretty purses that just carry smokes and money. THEN I have the Utility Purse of Doom. You need one too I think. I hope you poop. *fiber*

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