Thursday, December 24, 2009

Merry Christmas, Happy New Year & All That Stuff

How amazing is her voice?

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Never Thought I Would Actually

miss my glasses. I have worn glasses since kindergarten. 26 motherfucking years. A LONG time. I HATED wearing glasses. You would not believe the kind of disdain I had for those things. I even went without them for a couple of years when I was younger.

I chose to not be able to see rather than wear my glasses.

I had Lasik done on Friday.

I keep trying to put my glasses on. Sometimes I even panic when we're about to leave the house.

How can I leave the house without my glasses???

The best thing about having Lasik done? I am now able to wear a REAL pair of sunglasses. Not prescription sunglasses. REAL sunglasses.

Only $150 for my REAL sunglasses. And just under $4000 for the Lasik.

Merry Motherfucking Christmas To Me. (and not to my glasses)

Friday, October 16, 2009

A Little While Ago

my 7 year old puked up the entire contents of his stomach.

Then he yelled, CALL THE DOCTOR! at the top of his lungs.

It was so comical. Really. Or maybe you had to be there.

And me, being the best mom I could be, was really only thinking: HOW DO I BLOG THIS?!!

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

One Of The Reasons

I am totally in love with Graham Norton.

Sunday, October 11, 2009

Karma Bites Me In The

motherfucking ass. Every time.

I wrote something about having the pig flu here. It was supposed to be a joke.

But if you don't get it, oh well.

Guess I shouldn't have tempted fate, because my poor 5 year old daughter is sicker than a dog. The only way I can keep her fever below 105 is to piggy back Motrin and Tylenol.

Oh yes, and there was the great suggestion by an unnamed nurse to dunk her in a bath of COLD water. (parents, please do not dunk your children in cold water when they have fevers. Use, lukewarm water. If the water is cold, they will shiver, which will actually RAISE their body temperature).

I would bring her in to the ER, but they are not testing or treating children for the Swine flu if they are otherwise healthy.

I thank my lucky stars she is.

She is feeling totally miserable, so thoughts and prayers would be appreciated.

Thursday, October 8, 2009

As We Are Walking

out of my 5 year old's daycare.

Me: Do you need to go potty?

Her: No, that's my shoes squeaking.

Wednesday, October 7, 2009

Is It Just Me

or does it take a special kind of idiot to work as a receptionist at the Community Health Center?

Sunday, October 4, 2009


when I was a little girl and my mom would always let me open the new can of cofee.

She knew how much I love the sound and smell of that first whirl of coffee goodness.

I always felt so special standing with her while she watched over me.

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

I read this today.

You know when you're least expecting it and something jumps up and slaps you in the face. With a brick. Hard?

That's what happened here.

That 1st paragraph spoke to me so loudly that I cannot help but hear it. There's no way to ignore it.

Here I am. And I need to do something about it.

About a year ago my depression was getting so bad I was making everyone in my family completely and totally miserable. I was sad, angry, bitter, so tired, and weepy all of the time. It never let up.

While I was being being evaluated they also diagnosed me with some other stuff.

  • Bi-polar disorder
  • General anxiety disorder
  • Attention deficit disorder
  • Obsessive-compulsive disorder
  • Post traumatic stress disorder
Yeah. Heavy stuff. I may even be forgetting one or two, but these are the major ones so I'm sure you get the idea.

Then it seemed like I was even worse off. All these disorders weighed so heavy on me. I was so much more miserable. I don't have insurance so my treatment options are very limited. What I'm taking doesn't seem to help much. Nor does the one on one therapy I'm partaking in.

I haven't worked outside of the home in about 3 years. Really I haven't done much of anything outside of the home. Or inside either, if truth be told.

My family has had to pick up a lot of slack because I haven't been able to.

The point of this? I think I got off at the wrong exit on this Highway of Life.

This is not me. I am not a victim. It is only my fault that I am 28 (for the 4th year in a row) and have done almost nothing with my life.

What am I going to do?

I'm going to get back on that highway and make sure I find the right exit.

Thursday, August 20, 2009

A Bit Of Clarification

about my last Music Monday Post.

The band is called Hapanstance. They are totally awesome. I really hope they hit the big time. They are all great people and they really deserve it.

The song is called Cinderella. I loooovvveeee that song. That's why I posted it on my blog.

I just thought the video of it was a bit boring, since you can't see the band or anything. I just wanted to warn anyone who watched it, so they weren't like what the fuck is this? It really wasn't bad. Just not lively.

You can find more of their songs on YouTube. Just search for Hapanstance.

You can find them on MySpace here.

Show them some love. They promise not to forget the little people when they make it big.

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

True Story

Her: Mom, you drive me crazy.

Me: Daughter, you drive me crazy too.

Her: Mom, I'm too little to drive, remember?

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Music Monday ~Cinderella~ Hapanstance

Yes, I realize I'm a day late here. I can't help it.

I took a trip this last weekend to Tucson, AZ where a couple of my good friends live. I was fortunate enough to be able to go out and see a local band. They are awesome and a new favorite.

I really hope they tour up in Colorado as planned.

I realize the video isn't the best. It's downright boring, but let me know what you think of the music.

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Are All Insurance Adjusters

and anyone who works that part of the insurace business total fucking assholes?

Because I'll tell ya what. It sure looks that way from here.

Motherfucking hail.

Monday, August 10, 2009

Music Monday ~Angel~ Flipsyde

Very touching song about a mom who has had a very tough life.

Saturday, August 1, 2009

July Top Droppers

I have a great bunch of people who visit regularly. Awesome!

Friday, July 31, 2009

Why I Don't Have A Treadmill

I almost pissed my pants.

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

True Story

Me: Did you wash your face?

6 yr. old: Does it look like I washed my face?

Ahh, they learn so young, don't they?

Monday, July 27, 2009

Music Monday ~Angels On The Moon~ Thriving Ivory

A new favorite. There is so much emotion in his voice.

Sunday, July 26, 2009

The Rehearsal Might Have Sucked....

but I bet the reception was a blast!!

I think this is the most amazing wedding I've ever seen.

I hope they choose to dance...for the rest of their lives.

Read the news story here.

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Music Monday ~Stay~ Sugarland as sung by Michelle

This is my friend Michelle. No one can sing karaoke like this chick. Love ya!!

Thursday, July 9, 2009

Totally Fucking Outrageous

You have to love a nation where this shit still happens. This is the stuff that makes me embarrassed to be white.

More than 60 campers from Northeast Philadelphia were turned away from a private swim club and left to wonder if their race was the reason.

Watch Video

Kids at Creative Steps Day Camp were thrilled to go swimming once a week at the Valley Swim Club. But after only one trip to the private club, they were...

"I heard this lady, she was like, 'Uh, what are all these black kids doing here?' She's like, 'I'm scared they might do something to my child,'" said camper Dymire Baylor.

The Creative Steps Day Camp paid more than $1900 to The Valley Swim Club. The Valley Swim Club is a private club that advertises open membership. But the campers' first visit to the pool suggested otherwise.

"When the minority children got in the pool all of the Caucasian children immediately exited the pool," Horace Gibson, parent of a day camp child, wrote in an email. "The pool attendants came and told the black children that they did not allow minorities in the club and needed the children to leave immediately."

The next day the club told the camp director that the camp's membership was being suspended and their money would be refunded.

"I said, 'The parents don't want the refund. They want a place for their children to swim,'" camp director Aetha Wright said.

Campers remain unsure why they're no longer welcome.

"They just kicked us out. And we were about to go. Had our swim things and everything," said camper Simer Burwell.

The explanation they got was either dishearteningly honest or poorly worded.

"There was concern that a lot of kids would change the complexion … and the atmosphere of the club," John Duesler, President of The Valley Swim Club said in a statement.

Original Story Here.

Monday, July 6, 2009

Music Monday ~Hurt So Good~ John Mellencamp

Whyis it that love feels like this sometimes?

Friday, July 3, 2009

June Top Droppers

You guys totally rock, as always.

Thanks for visiting my blog even though I haven't been around Entrecard as much lately. I'll be back. It's just a funk, and this too shall pass.

Monday, June 29, 2009

Can I Please

sleep for a week? Just one. Is that too much to ask?

Music Monday ~Poker Face ~ Lady Gaga~

This song just sort of explains how I feel right now. Of course, not in the sense she means it. It has nothing to do with love and guys. I just feel like I am so sad on the inside, but I have to put up this amazing front so I don't let everyone else see it. I feel like there is just so much expected of me. There are so many things I have to do, but feel like I cannot get them all done. And then of course, really, I have it easier than most, so I feel guilty for having these feelings in the first place.

Enjoy the music.

Sunday, June 28, 2009

Am I cute?

Her: Your face is all red and sunburnt.

Me: Yours is red too.

Her: No, mine is cute.

Did she just say I'm not cute?

Sunday, June 21, 2009


Him: I found a XBox 360 at work today.

Me: Does it work?

Him: I don't know.

Me: I really hope it does, that way it can be your Father's Day present.....

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Wordless Wednesday ~ Roots

We went to Helen Hunt Falls this past weekend. It's in Colorado Springs, Colorado. I took hundreds of pictures, but this is one of my favorites.

I think the amount of wash off is absolutely amazing.

Monday, June 8, 2009


No, not really. I'm just not feelin' the love right now.

Do you ever get like that?

What's your excuse?

I just feel really down right now. I think it has something to do with my 3 kids being out of school for the summer.

I think they invented school just so parents wouldn't go completely crazy, lol!!

I can't think of much new to blog about right now. In the past I've had lots of ideas and I've written them all down. I try to go back through what I already have written down, but none of it seems relevant right now.

I'm sure someone will piss me off soon and I'll have more witty and sarcastic posts.


That's it. I have nothing else to give right now.

What I Got by Sublime ~ Music Monday

Okay, a little late in the day...but hey...wouldn't be me if it weren't late.

This is by one of my all-time favorite bands, Sublime. I LOVEEE them. I love the message behing this song. This isn't my favorite video for this song, but it's what I could find.

Let's all sing along now....

Wednesday, June 3, 2009

Wordless Wednesday

This one is an oldy. About 3 or 4 years old I think? But I think it's funny. My kids are so grubby and those glasses are absolutely hilarious.

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

My Eyes Are Dry

Me: Let's do it.

Him: My eyes are too dry.

Me: Really?

True Story. And yes, I realize it make no sense what-so-ever.

So, I want to hear yours... What's the stupidest thing someone has said while turning you down? 

Spill it.

Just Over 3 Hours

into summer vacation and I already want to run far, far away. Far. Far. Away. Far.

Monday, June 1, 2009

If My Order

comes to $5.37 (five dollars and thirty-seven cents) and I hand you a twenty (20) dollar bill and thirty-seven (37) cents, you owe me more than two (2) five (5) dollar bills. No matter how hard you argue with me. Motherfucker.

Get a fucking calculator.

P.S. I put the numbers in parenthesis just in case you can't follow along.

I Ate

seven (7) hotdogs yesterday. With bun, slice of cheese, and ketchup.

Not all at one time, mind you. But still. 7 frickin' hotdogs.

Music Monday ~ Love Hurts ~ Nazareth

I love this song, but the video makes me laugh hysterically.

Sunday, May 31, 2009

Top Droppers For May

You guys rock!! Thanks for stopping in. :o)

Saturday, May 30, 2009

How To Melt My Heart

Ask me in all seriousness in your cute little 4 year old voice if toys are healthy for us.

As in, Mom is salad (toys) healthy for us?

Yes, yes they are.

Thursday, May 28, 2009

They Got My Camera

What happens when my 4 year old and 6 year old get ahold of my camera:


The Shorts

The Camera Strap

The Closet Floor

The Toy Lemon

The Room (from the top of the headboard)...

And Now The Culprit:

The Hand

The Nose

The Lips

The Teeth

The Tongue

Now you know more about my son than you ever wanted to know. I found these while getting some pics of some good friends off my memory card and because they were so unexpected I giggled. A lot.

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Wordless Wednesday ~ In The Jungle

Another one taken at the zoo with my 4 year old. I LOVE this one!

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Debt Collectors:

Please don't think I won't report your ass if you call me before 8 a.m. I so will. 

(Especially if it's for a debt I never knew I had....that happens to be about 11 years old).

Monday, May 25, 2009

Music Monday - Proud To Be An American

I am very proud to be an American. I cry when I hear this song, but I love it dearly.

On another note, did anyone watch the shows on 9/11 last night? I was able to see bits an pieces, but it it still so painful for me to watch. I didn't have any family members who were directly involved in the situation, and it still is so hard to see. I can can barely watch it.

This goes out to all of our soldiers, our soldiers family's, and the victims in connection with any terrorist happening.

Sometimes I Feel

like cancer, making everything I touch bad and ugly.

Thursday, May 21, 2009

What Bothers Me

The mixing of the gallons of milk.

Ya know, when you're filling up your glass and there just isn't enough left in the jug, so you have to pour from a new one to fill up your glass? 

I can not stand the mixing of virgin milk with non-virgin milk.


Probably. I can't help it.

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

How To Provoke Me

Let your dog shit on my grass.

MY dogs don't even get to shit on my grass.

Wordless Wednesday ~ At The Zoo

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

How To Provoke Me

Allow me to use your site to promote my blog for 4 fucking days...all the while advertising your shit on MY blog.....

Then tell me my blog has been removed for "Inappropriate Content."

You know who you are! (Adgitize)!!

Monday, May 18, 2009

Does Your Child Partake In Any Sport?

Good for them. I hope they do wonderful, excel, and in the end just have a whole shitload of fun. 

Because really, that's what it's about, right? Fun?

I always thought so. 

I was in bowling from 4th grade on up. I had a pretty good average, but had a lot of off days. I still bowl. My average isn't as good as it used to be, and I have even more off days. But bowling is still fun. 22 years later, I still think bowling is the best thing since sliced bread.

If your kid has an off day...Leave them the fuck alone!! Or try encouraging them. Or give them a hug. Or a thumbs up. A smile? Anything but yelling and demeaning them.

My 10 year old son just competed in his 1st State Bowling Tournament. This was his first year bowling, in fact.

He got up there and threw a lot of gutter balls. He threw a lot of 1 and 2 pin counts. And I thought he did awesome! Why?

Because his sportsmanship was terrific. Absolutely amazing.

There were more than a few kids who were bowling with or near my children who were supposedly the worlds best youth bowlers. Or that's what you would have thought by the way their parents acted. 

Hit your mark! Move over! Did you move over a board to get that spare? I thought so. Move over! You're ball isn't going fast enough! You need to throw harder! Is this just a game to you? We can go home right now if you're just going to play around. (REALLY? Cause that's what I thought it was).

It is just a motherfucking game. The same as anything else.

You could see these kids deflate when they didn't get a good count. Every time they went up to throw that ball. I just wanted to cry for them. (I did, just a little).

These kids were feeling so dejected they couldn't even partake in any joy when they did throw a strike or a spare. They would slink off the lane, their faces in a scowl, awaiting the next comment about what they could have done to make that strike better. 

My whole point is, what these parents were doing to their kids was not helping them. They did 6 games yesterday, one right after the other. These kids got progressively worse and worse. (And yelled at more and more). The kids who had the parents behind them who were clapping for a gutter ball got better and better.

Please parents. SUPPORT your child. Give the praise and hugs and high fives and claps and whatever else. Maybe even some constructive criticism.

But don't beat them up for doing poorly. It will only make them do more poorly and in the end, just feel bad about themselves.

Now for some bragging. My son went in with a 51 average and bowled both sets of 3 games with a 63 average. Totally fucking awesome, right?  (I didn't sit down and figure any of this out until last night after he went to bed. And it didn't really matter, but the OCD part of me just had to figure it out).

Music Monday ~ Bittersweet Symphony ~ The Verve

Okay. You gotta love this song. First, it was on the ending of Cruel Intentions. I swear that was one of the best endings to a movie in the history of movies. I don't know what's second or third. I just love this song.

Thursday, May 14, 2009

Jesus! Jesus!

My 4 year old had a field trip to the zoo with her pre-school class today. I was only embarrassed to be a mom once or twice.

The first was when she climbed up on a rock with 3 other kids from her class. 

One of the moms went to take a picture. I think one of the other moms said, "Say cheese!!"

My daughter started yelling:

Jesus! Jesus! Jesus! Jesus!

Everyone laughed their asses off. (except me. I was scared she would add something after the jesus).

Another mom:(I think jokingly?) What kind of a mom are you?

What could I say? Nothing but, I am a bad mom. I'm not going to lie to you, I'm a bad mom. It is what it is."

And really all I could think was please don't say anything after the jesus, please don't say anything after the jesus, please don't say anything after the jesus.....Get off the jesus goddamn motherfucking rock. Please.

Yep. Here's my Maddy. On the rock. Not sure what she's yelling at this point...

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Wordless Wednesday

Another beautiful evening in Colorado. I could fall into them. Ahhhhhh.......

Monday, May 11, 2009

Music Monday

You'll never know what hit you when I get to you.

One of my old favs.

Does The Word

"hubby" bother anyone else? It makes my skin crawl. Not sure why.

Thursday, May 7, 2009

How To Provoke Me

Call me 15 (motherfucking) times a day. If I wanted to talk to you, I would have answered the 1st time.

Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Wordless Wednesday

Starfish at Moody Gardens, Galveston, TX

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

On My Way

to being a productive member of society. I just made an appointment with an Admissions Counselor for tomorrow. And it's for the University here. University! To be a Regisered Nurse.

I know, you're saying, what's the big deal? I guess it wouldn't be, but I haven't worked (or done much of anything else) for 3 or 4 years due to depression, anxiety, PTSD, ADD and bi-polar. I think that's all of them. So there, that's out in the open. God, it feels good to get that off my chest.

Anyway, all I really wanted to do was to say

HOLY FUCKING SHIT! I'VE GOT AN APPOINTMENT FOR ADMITTANCE IN A UNIVERSITY. Lord help them now, they have no idea what they're in for.

Getting Stronger With Some Motivation

My New Years Resolution is to run in a marathon this year. Well, most likely a half marathon, but more like a 5K. And it will probably be next year instead of this year. But there it is. That's what I'm working towards.

For the last 2 weeks I have been out running....errrr....walking as fast as I can with a little bit of jogging here and there. I do 2 miles every time I go out.

The 1st week I was so disappointed because I didn't feel like I was getting any stronger or any faster. I know it takes longer than that to see real results, but I don't like to wait for results.

This week (my 2nd week) I have been doing more slacking off. I haven't been out as much as I should have and a couple nights I did the Gazelle (oh horrible, horrible beast!) instead of getting out and doing the real thing.

Thankfully tonight one of my good friends (Loveeee you C!) motivated me. She wants to get back in shape as well. So she started running her 2 miles, as well. It didn't go as well as she had planned.

Her motivation went something like this:

"I really thought I could go faster than you because you're heavier than me."

No, she wasn't saying it to be mean, and I didn't take it that way. But really, being overweight hurts. So I got my ass out there and did it.

And I finally felt STRONGER!! I really did. I went out there and pushed myself. I actually made myself SUCK. WIND. Not just a little bit of huffy puffy, boy am I tired. I pushed myself. I pushed myself hard. 

Next time I will push myself even harder.


Monday, May 4, 2009

Swine Flu

I woke up sick today. It's either 1 of 2 things:

1. Pig flu


2. The 12 brownies I ate last night.

Sunday, May 3, 2009

Better Things To Do

Me: I have 14 followers now.

Him: Redonculous! They should have something better to do with their day.

Just Desserts

I promised myself that I wouldn't buy any more brownie mix (even if it was on sale).

I hurried up and used the 4 or 5 boxes we had, just to get rid of them.

I didn't buy more, really.

I just made some from scratch.

Friday, May 1, 2009

More Of Me

Me: My new blog post is about things I love. I put up a picture of ear plugs.

Him: Big huge eye roll and shaking of the head.

Me: Do you just think I'm so stupid and retarded or what?

Him: No, I just think you're funny.

Me: I have 12 followers.

Him: And there's more of you.

Things I Love. Really.

Ear Plugs. I buy them in bulk.

Thursday, April 30, 2009

April Top Droppers

Whatever Comes To My Mind

Thank you so very much. I appreciate the support! Hope to see you around in May.

Bartering For Good Behavior?

I just got done meeting with one of my therapists, for lack of a better word. I'm not exactly sure what I should call her, besides heaven sent. We spent a good part of the hour discussing my 10 year old's behavior. It is not pretty.

What I'm doing currently is not working. Obviously. So she suggested bartering for good behavior.

It would go something like this: He gets grounded for hitting his brother, but is then able to do chores (or whatever else we can think of) to get ungrounded earlier.

At first I was resistant to the idea. Very resistant. To me, that sounds like I'm making it okay to do the crime, because he can always be pardoned earlier. Towards the very end of the hour, I'm thinking, welllll it can't hurt to try it, really, can it?

On the way home it kind of hit me though. I mean, what the fuck? I have to actually barter with my 10 year old for good behavior? (Angela, if you are reading this, please don't be upset. I am not aiming any anger towards you. I appreciate all you do for us!). I mean, how bad have things really become, that I have to bribe...uhh....I mean barter with my son for him to not hit his brother, or to not throw a fit, or to do his homework, or to clean his room?

Please!! What do you do to help your kid with ADHD, and most likely ODD? I would love some tips here. Some constructive tips, please. I really don't need meaness. I need suggestions.

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

I Promise

to have as much fun as humanly possible while cleaning out the garage. Really. I will.

Wordless Wednesday

Sunday, April 26, 2009

100 Posts

So, my last post just happened to be post number 100. And, of course, I brought it in unceremoniously talking about donuts. Really?

Saturday, April 25, 2009

I Couldn't

go for a walk tonight due to wind and rain, so instead I ate some donuts.

Friday, April 24, 2009

Talking About Tattoos

with my 4 year old daughter.

Her: Mom, what's this?

Me: It's a tattoo.

Her: Is it paint?

Me: Nope, it's ink.

Her: Ink?

Me: Yes, and it will never come off.

Her: Wow!

Me: Wow?

Her: Wow! Didn't see that one coming!

Craving More

Cool Ranch Doritos, but only because it's after midnight and I have to fast for labs. Suck ass.

Thursday, April 23, 2009

I Had The

right away and I still stopped for your unyielding ass. How am I the bitch, bitch?


why I thought it would be a good idea to buy Cool Ranch Doritos and make brownies on the same day.

Wednesday, April 22, 2009


if he does dishes in the dark.

Wordless Wednesday

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

You Totally Made Me Feel

loved, because when you were staring at me with those big, brown puppy dog eyes, I told you to go lay down. Instead you knew that I really needed to be kept warm and jumped on top of me and laid your massive 85 furry pounds directly on top of me and wouldn't budge. Good girl, Goldie.

Monday, April 20, 2009

Feeling Guilty

for eating that entire Chipotle Burrito without taking a breath or even wiping the drips that made it down to my elbows. And the side of tortilla chips.

Music Monday

This song pretty much sums up my life right now. I'm on the verge of some life altering changes. I can't wait!! (But I'm a little scared too).

Sunday, April 19, 2009


about the faintly kind of poopy smell I'm smelling. I honestly do not want to find out what it is.

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Sad Because

I had to ask you if you loved me. And although you didn't say no, you didn't say "yes."

Tuesday, April 14, 2009


for shouting, "son of a whore!" while in the office at the school my kids go to.

Monday, April 13, 2009


Does it make my 10 year old feel good to be carried into school by his dad and the liason officer? Again.

Music Monday

Australians singing about touching themselves. It doesn't get any better than that.

Sunday, April 12, 2009


If your 10 year old drops a bottle of fingernail polish in the fridge and it breaks (and you don't clean it all the way up), your ice will then totally taste like fingernail polish. But that's way better than garlic ice.


Hershey's Kisses and Nestle Crunch Eggs.

Saturday, April 11, 2009

How To Provoke Me

Take out my working car window switches, clean them, then put them back non-functioning.

Friday, April 10, 2009

How To Provoke Me

Not only put onions on the burger I so nicely asked you not too, but cut the fuckers so small I can't actually pick them off.

Thursday, April 9, 2009


Has drinking Diet Coke for the last 10 years made me stupider? I'm not sure if I even spelt that right.

Queen of Blogs Award!!

Man that feels nice. :o) Thank you to Andrea over at MomWriterMe.

I would like to pass this award on to:

On The Verge

Pregnant With Cancer

Complete Unsubtle Irony

Anywhere But Here

Go Blog Yourself

Whacked in the Head

>What's even cooler about this award is you can choose between 3 different styles. Check them out here.

Wednesday, April 8, 2009


Do we really need a movie about guinea pig espionage?

I don't think we do.


I wash each and every dish twice. Totally insane.

How To Provoke Me

Shut my mailbox. I leave it open for a reason jacktard.


He says he thought he told me. He didn't.

He got into a minor accident yesterday. I found out when the insurance rep left a message at our home.

He got a ticket. He got a fine of over a hundred bucks.

He got points on his license.

He fucked our insurance rate with one fail swoop.

I am pissed.

Monday, April 6, 2009

Music Monday

One of my all-time favorite songs by an awesome band. RIP Brad.

Come join Music Monday and share your songs with us. One simple rule, leave ONLY the actual post link here. You can grab this code at LJL Please note these links are STRICTLY for Music Monday participants only. All others will be deleted without prejudice.

Vibrating Touch???

If you're ever up after 10 p.m. you've seen this commercial.

I completely loathe this commercial. I'm not sure if it's the chicken heads sitting there laughing every time they say something, or what. But really. I hate it.

At least it comes in this awesome little bag. Right.

Thursday, April 2, 2009

I Figured Out What I Was Doing Wrong At Bowling....

I was missing the pins.

Monday, March 30, 2009

Music Monday

Congratulations by Blue October

This isn't the original video, but it was the best I could find. I hope you enjoy this song as much as I do.

Saturday, March 28, 2009

Red Chili Recipe for HCG Diet, Phase 2

I had this last night and it was absolutely scrumptious!!

2 1/2 cups Chicken Broth (make sure it has zero fat & carbs)
1 Tbsp. Chili Powder
1 Tbsp. Cumin
2 tsp. Onion Powder
1/4 tsp. Garlic Powder
100 grams  Pork
1 Tomato (your fruit)
1 cup Cabbage (your veggie)

Add everything to a small  pot. Bring to a boil, then let it simmer for about 30 minutes.

You can also add cayenne pepper, black pepper, etc.

Friday, March 27, 2009

Mom... Do You Need A Brain To Talk?

Unfortunately, no you don't.

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Wordless Wednesday

Did this really come from me?

Monday, March 23, 2009

100 Random Questions.

1. Do you sleep with your closet doors open or closed?

2. Do you take the shampoos and conditioner bottles from hotels?
Usually use them there.

3. Are you afraid to fly?

4. Have you ever stolen a street sign before?

5. Do you like to use post-it notes?
Not particularly.

6. Do you cut out coupons but then never use them?
I leave them in the circular and clip as I need them.

7. Would you rather be attacked by a big bear or a swarm of a bees?
I'd have to say bees.

8. Do you have freckles?

9. Do you always smile for pictures?
I try to.

10. What is your biggest pet peeve?
Please do not get me started.... I can't stop at just one.

11. Do you ever count your steps when you walk?

12. Have you ever peed in the woods?
The Army certainly doesn't provide porta potties in the field.

13. Do you prefer the beach or mountains?
Beach but I live by the mountains.

14. Do you ever dance even if there's no music playing?
I'd rather not scare my children.

15. Do you chew your pens and pencils?

16. Favorite reality show?
Little People, Big World and Jon & Kate + Eight.

17. What size is your bed?

18. What is your Song of the week?
Gives  You Hell by All-American Rejects.

19. Is it okay for guys to wear pink?
Probably not.... 

20. Do you still watch cartoons?
Almost every day with my daughter.

21. What’s your least favorite movie?
The Matrix Series

22. Where would you bury hidden treasure if you had some?
Why would I tell anyone?

23. What do you drink with dinner?
Iced tea or water.

24. What do you dip a chicken nugget in?
Honey mustard or ranch.

25. What is your favorite food?
Chinese, Mexican, and pizza.

26. What movie could you watch over and over and still love? 
My Best Friend's Girl, The Green Mile, Forest Gump.

27. Last person you kissed?
My lover, my husband, one and the same.

28. Were you ever a boy/girl scout?
Girl Scout's Honor!

29. Would you ever strip or pose nude in a magazine?
For the right price, I'm sure.

30. When was the last time you wrote a letter to someone on paper?
About 5 years ago.

31. Can you change the oil on a car?
I can, but it has to go up on ramps or my chest can't fit under...

32. Ever gotten a speeding ticket?
Nope. Knock on wood.

33. Ran out of gas?
About 10 years ago in a friend's car. 

34. Favorite kind of sandwich?
Meatball Marinara.

35. Best thing to eat for breakfast?
Pancakes or French Toast.

36. Favorite Music?
Almost everything but hard rock and techno.

37. Are you lazy?
For sure sometimes.

38. When you were a kid, what did you dress up as for Halloween?
Superman, Garfield, a baby, a witch.

39. What is your astrological sign?
I am on the cusp of Pisces and Aquarius.

40. How many languages can you speak?
1. Barely.

41. Do you have any magazine subscriptions?
Prevention and All You.

42.Which are better legos or lincoln logs?

43. Are you stubborn?
No way. Not me. Ever. Hahaha!!

44. Who is better Leno or Letterman?
Ummm....Conan O'Brian.

45. Ever watch soap operas?
Not in many, many years.

46. Afraid of heights?
Oh yeah.

47. Sing in the car?
I love to belt out tunes at the top of my lungs in the car. Sorry kids.

48. Sing in the shower?
No. I like to think in the shower.

49. Dance in the car?
If it's a really good song, then yes.

50. Ever used a gun?
Standard issue in the military. Plus we used to shoot when we were kids.

51. Last time you got a portrait taken by a photographer?
1995 for my senior pics.

52. Do you think musicals are cheesy?
Love 'em.

53. Is Christmas stressful?
Only because they stress my other half out.

54. Ever eat a pierogi?

55. Favorite type of fruit pie?
My Apple Pie.

56. Occupations you wanted to be when you were a kid?
Doctor or nurse.

57. Do you believe in ghosts?
I've seen 'em.

58. Ever have a Deja-vu feeling?

59. Take a vitamin daily?
Sometimes. But usually not.

60. Wear slippers?
I hate stuff on my feet. In fact, I wouldn't wear shoes if society didn't make me.

61. Wear a bath robe?

62. What do you wear to bed?
Shorts and a tank top in the summer, jammies in the winter.

63. First concert? 
Real concert was The Judds on their final tour, but we used to go to the ones at the county fair alll the time. Saw Johnny Cash, Reba McIntyre, Eddie Rabbit, tons o tons of great concerts.

64. Wal-Mart, Target or Kmart?
Wal-Mart. It's cheaper.

65. Nike or Adidas ?
Nike for walking and running shoes.

66.Cheetos Or Fritos?
Cheetos. Unless I have bean dip...then Fritos.

67. Peanuts or Sunflower seeds?
Sunflower seeds.

68. Ever hear of the group Tres Bien?
Don't think so....

69. Ever take dance lessons?
Nope. Mom made it perfectly clear they would not be for me.

70. Is there a profession you picture your significant other doing?
Something management and high earning.

71. Can you curl your tongue?

72. Ever won a spelling bee?
Just the one at the school, but lost at the city one. :o)

73. Have you ever cried because you were so happy?

74. Own any record albums?

75. Own a record player?

76. Regularly burn incense?
Just candles.

77. Ever been in love?
Still am...

78. Who would you like to see in concert? 
Matchbox 20, Blue October, Bad Fish.

79. What was the last concert you saw? 
The Judds (see #63) LOL!!

80.Hot tea or cold tea?

81.Tea or coffee?

82. Sugar cookies or snicker doodles?
Homemade sugar cookies.

83.Can you swim well?
I'm alright.

84.Can you hold your breath without holding your nose?

85. Are you patient?
Depends on the situation, but usually not.

86. DJ or band, at a wedding?

87.Ever won a contest?
Yes. $150 on

88. Ever have plastic surgery?
I wish.

89. Which are better black or green olives?
Usually eat black olives, but love both.

90.Can you knit or crochet?

91. Best room for a fireplace?
Living room or bedroom.

92. Do you want to get married?
Already there. Love it.

93. If married, how long have you been married?
Just over 8 years.

95. Do you cry and throw a fit until you get your own way?

96. Do you have kids?
3 little monsters.

97. Do you want kids? 
Already got 'em.

98. What’s your favorite color?

99. Do you miss anyone right now?
So many friends and family I haven't seen in years, yes.

100. Did you watch Next Great American Band on FOX?
Nope. Not interested.

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